When Blue Ivy Carter made her on-stage performance debut during her mother Beyoncé’s Renaissance World Tour in May, the accomplishment didn’t come without controversy.
“There [were] lots of negative things that people had to say,” Carter, 11, said during “Renaissance: A Film by Beyoncé,” a documentary and concert film released on Friday. Thousands of concert-goers cheered for the pre-teen in Paris as she danced to “My Power” and “Black Parade,” but on social media, the feedback was less supportive.
The harsh, public criticism could’ve dissuaded her from stepping foot on stage again. Joining her mom’s tour was already a one-time deal — a reward for practicing her dancing and showing her commitment to building a work ethic, Beyoncé said.
Instead, the experience motivated Carter to prove her critics wrong, she said: “I feel like now my mindset has changed, and now I actually have to wake up in the morning, go to rehearsals and I have to actually work harder.”
The film cut directly to the tour’s final show in Kansas City, Missouri, where Carter joined Beyoncé on stage again, seemingly more confident and comfortable this time around. The mother-daughter duo ultimately co-performed at over 15 shows over a five-month period.
The turnaround marked a display of resilience, which didn’t go unnoticed by Carter’s mother.
“I feel so honored to be on stage with you,” Beyoncé told her daughter, in the documentary. “It’s incredible, it’s 70,000 people out there sometimes. And you are handling it, and thriving, and I am so proud of you.”
How to help your child be more resilient
Most children don’t carry the weight of performing in front of thousands, but many can relate to the anxiety, negativity and emotional stress that come with stepping out of their comfort zones.
Instead of praising the outcome of your child’s work, praise the process it took them to complete it, child psychologist Francyne Zeltser told CNBC Make It last year.
“When parents praise the outcome, it holds kids back from developing resilience, confidence and a desire to learn new things,” said Zeltser. “The goal is to support your children’s learning strategies and show them how those strategies can lead to success.”
Zeltser also recommended helping your child embrace failure and imperfections as opportunities for growth. “Encourage them to recognize, accept and overcome their ‘weaknesses.’ Remind them that they have the tools and support to grow in the ways that they want to,” she said.
“Children who value learning and effort know how to make and sustain a commitment to their goals,” Zeltser added. “They are not afraid to work hard, and they know that meaningful tasks involve setbacks. These are the lessons that will serve them well in life.”
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